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Animals to be released into Chester in event of closure –...
Shopping in Chester is expected to get more hazardous following the announcement by Chester Zoo that all of its animals will be released into...
Nominate your dealer for Drug Dealer of the Year 2018
If your dealer is voted Drug Dealer of the Year 2018 he, or she, will win £1,000 in cash and you will receive £1,000...
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Entertainment
Gammon Furious Polish Immigrants get their own ‘station’
A particularly angry gammon, from Ellesmere Port, was reportedly FURIOUS today when he saw that Polish Immigrants had their own station. Kevin ‘Brains’ Thomas,...
Brighthouse now accepting human souls as payment
Popular chav store, Brighthouse, has confirmed it is now accepting human souls as payment for products in each of its 270+ shops.
The ‘rent to...
Londoner phones Liverpool and spends 10 minutes speaking with fax machine
A businessman from London recently spent 10 minutes on the phone to a fax machine, believing he was speaking with a scouser.
The man, thirty-eight-year-old...
Woman asking for recommendations on Facebook really wants the cheapest
An Ellesmere Port woman posting on Facebook for personal recommendations isn’t in the slightest bit interested in the quality, it has been confirmed. Twenty-six-year-old...
Doctor prescribes Facebook ‘like and share’ treatment for Cancer sufferer
A Cancer specialist at the Countess of Chester Hospital has taken the radical step of prescribing a course of Facebook likes and shares for...
Man’s ‘Wank Bank’ emptied after seeing photo of mum in thong
An Ellesmere Port man, Dave Thomas from Little Sutton, has had his entire wank bank emptied in a shocking incident this week.
As Dave was...
Your lunch hour is the best time for us to visit the Post Office...
The UK’s pensioners have announced that your lunch hour in work is, in fact, the optimum time for them to make a trip to...
Countess of Chester Hospital replaces Emergency Unit with Healing Crystals Ward
Chester’s nearest hospital has taken the unusual step of scrapping its emergency ward in favour of a new Healing Crystals ward.
The move was made...
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