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Chester to reintroduce Roman style communal toilets
Chester is to spark a return to its Roman roots by reintroducing Roman style communal toilets. The move is part of a government scheme...
Brighthouse now accepting human souls as payment
Popular chav store, Brighthouse, has confirmed it is now accepting human souls as payment for products in each of its 270+ shops.
The ‘rent to...
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Entertainment
McDonald’s to bow to customer demands and serve hot fries
The Cheshire Oaks branch of McDonald's will start serving hot fries, it has been confirmed.
Customers of McDonald’s, on Cheshire Oaks, have previously had two...
Ellesmere Port becomes first UK town to ditch roundabout rules
In a bold move, Ellesmere Port has become the first town in Britain to ditch roundabout regulations, it has been revealed. Council leaders announced...
Monopoly: Ellesmere Port Edition available now from Asda
A special Ellesmere Port Edition of Monopoly has been released today, and is available to buy from Asda. The special edition of the popular...
FIFA awards 2026 World Cup to highest briber
A huge suitcase stuffed with cash was said to be the deciding factor on choosing the destination of the 2026 World Cup.
FIFA today revealed...
Gammons enraged nobody wants to own f*cking up the UK
The nation’s gammons are said to be furious that nobody wants to take ownership for utterly f*cking up the country.
Today saw Dominic Raab, the...
British passengers forced to strip for EU airport security following Brexit
Anyone travelling to within the EU on a British passport will now be forced to strip naked for airport security, it has been revealed.
The...
Cleaner praises man who throws chewing gum into urinal
A seventy-two-year-old woman from Ellesmere Port, Viv Thomas, has heaped praise on an unknown man for constantly spitting his chewing gum into a urinal.
Viv...
New app allows drivers to indicate with their phone
A new app has been released that allows motorists to indicate left or right using their thumb, while they're driving.
The recent law change making...
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