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From festivals in Florida to touring Dracula’s digs in Romania, we round up the best destinations to visit this October. As summer abandons Europe again this October, eke out the last of the rays and raves in Ibiza, where nightclubs will be going out with a bang for the winter break. When the party finally stops head to the island’s north.

Boris to AXE Child Support Agency as it’s costing him a f*cking wad

In a bold move, Boris Johnson has announced he is axing the Child Support Agency, effective immediately, due it the amount of money the...

Thousands hospitalised playing “Drink When Boris Lies” drinking game

Thousands of British have been admitted to hospital with alcohol poisoning after playing a popular drinking game about Boris Johnson. The game, entitled 'Drink...

‘Venice lacks common sense having so much water’ – says Jacob Rees-Mogg

The recent flooding of Venice, Italy, has been blamed on a 'lack of common sense' on the part of the Venetians by Tory MP,...

Man blames faulty video game on mass shootings

A man from Texas, in the USA, has announced that mass shootings are to blame for his copy of Call of Duty Black Ops...

Donald Trump unveils plans to combat immigration

The President of the United States, businessman Donald Trump, has always taken a hard line on immigration. His attempts to build a wall between...

Furbies provide valuable insight into future Trump / Boris meetings

As whimsical feckless moron, Boris Johnson, moves closer to taking control of the United Kingdom, a pair of Furbies has shown what a future...

Gammon Furious Polish Immigrants get their own ‘station’

A particularly angry gammon, from Ellesmere Port, was reportedly FURIOUS today when he saw that Polish Immigrants had their own station. Kevin ‘Brains’ Thomas,...

Multi-millionaire Nigel Farage ‘on my side’ insists feckless moron

Feckless moron, Steve Dobbs, insists Nigel Farage is on his side and is a ‘man of the people’. Despite working a zero hours contract that...

Phil Jones appointed new Secretary of State for Defence

Manchester United ace, Phil Jones, has been appointed by PM Theresa May as the new Secretary of State for Defence for the United Kingdom. The...

Teenager explains why UK government’s porn block is bollocks

A random teenager, named Kevin, has explained why the recently announced porn block that hopes to restrict teenagers under the age of 18 from...

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