COVID-19 Relieved to test negative for Trump
COVID-19 expressed an extreme sense of relief, this weekend, as a test for Trump proved negative.
The virus was concerned it may have contracted Trump...
Shitting in a cupboard voted best thing about caravan holidays
In a recent survey of caravaners from The Caravan Club, taking a shit in a cupboard came top of the most enjoyed things about...
McDonald’s to trial vending machines in Ellesmere Port
Peddler of high calorie children’s’ meals, McDonald’s, is to trial new vending machines in Ellesmere Port due to the uproar caused by the recent...
Not a single problem that couldn’t be solved with more guns – claims Trump
Orange buffoon, Donald Trump, declared there isn’t a single problem in the world that couldn’t be solved by adding more guns to the mix.
Speaking...
Costa Coffee to open new coffee shops inside people’s houses
Virally spreading coffee chain, Costa Coffee, has launched a new scheme to open coffee shops inside the homes of customers, and the expanding company...
Ellesmere Port rejoices as ‘scratchies’ to become Olympic sport
Ellesmere Port was, this morning, rejoicing at the news scratch cards (or 'scratchies) would be an event at the next Olympics.
During many Olympic Games...
Christmas is shit when you’re an adult – discovers 18-year-old
18-year-old Mark Jacobs, from Little Sutton, has discovered this morning that Christmas is really shit when you’re an adult.
Mark turned 18 in October and,...
Chester Zoo to open exhibit of Ellesmere Port men
The popular tourist attraction, Chester Zoo, has announced it is to open an exhibit featuring men from Ellesmere Port. The exhibit, entitled ‘Primitive Port’,...
Man arrested after failing to share albums that influenced him on Facebook
A local man was arrested this morning after he had failed to share the cover of an album that influenced him on Facebook yesterday.
The...
Read the abhorrent racist abuse sent via Facebook by Chester resident
We've been made aware of a targeted stream of racist abuse sent by a Chester resident, and former University of Chester student, which was...
