Ellesmere Port Asda first to hire FAT PEOPLE as human bicycle racks
Chubby trouser tamers can now earn some extra pasty money by acting as bicycle racks outside Asda in Ellesmere Port.
The move was announced this...
Man disappointed to find ‘Women’s Breast Stroke’ meant something else
Dean Thomas, from Ellesmere Port, was disappointed today when he had cleared his afternoon to watch the final of the Women’s Breaststroke.
Dean, who usually...
Arsenal’s Aaron Ramsey questioned by police over celebrity deaths
Arsenal and Wales footballer, Aaron Ramsey, is today being questioned by Metropolitan Police detectives over a spate of celebrity deaths.
It is alleged that Mr...
I’ve already completed new Man City sponsor Tinder, claims Raheem Sterling
Diminutive money-grabber, Raheem Sterling, claims to have already completed the game Tinder as they were announced as Manchester City’s new shirt sleeve sponsor earlier...
David Dickinson FURY as Corbyn admits HATRED of orange Jews
Bronzed TV host, David Dickinson, is enraged at the latest anti-Semitic outburst from Jeremy Corbyn.
In a recent appearance on the breakfast TV show, Saturday...
Coinstar CEO laughing tits off at poor who give him money
The CEO of Coinstar, Erik E. Prusch, has been laughing his absolute tits off at all of the poor people who chuck their money...
People who put milk in tea first have lower IQs, confirm scientists
A new report from leading scientists has confirmed that people who put their milk in their tea before the water suffer from lower intelligence....
Ellesmere Port Church Embraces April Fool’s Day with ‘Man Rises from the Dead’ Prank
St Thomas and All Saints Church, in Ellesmere Port, has embraced the spirit of April Fool’s Day today with an elaborate prank about a...
Jeremy Hunt’s parents confirm typo when registering his name
The parents of Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt have confirmed there was a typo when they registered his name, and his name is actually Jeremy...
Racist morons shocked chief racist moron banned from Twitter
A cluster of racist idiots have expressed their dismay on the social networking website, Twitter, about the banning of their imperious leader.
The decision by...
