Man shot 6 times by police for celebrating St George’s Day in Ellesmere Port
An Ellesmere Port man was, this morning, shot and killed by police for celebrating St George's Day. The man, 27-year-old Tom Bates, from Girton...
Gary Glitter to switch on Cheshire Oaks Christmas Lights
70s icon Gary Glitter has been revealed as the top billing for this year’s Christmas lights switch on at Cheshire Oaks.
The McArthurGlen owned designer...
Entire class disappears after dressing as “Where’s Wally” for World Book Day
The entire Year 3 from St. Savile's Primary School, in Ellesmere Port, has completely vanished after they all dressed as 'Wally' from the 'Where's...
Coronation Street to be released on 2,000-disc DVD Boxset
The entire series of Coronation Street is to be released on a 2,000 disc DVD boxset, it was revealed this morning. Fans of the...
Christmas is shit when you’re an adult – discovers 18-year-old
18-year-old Mark Jacobs, from Little Sutton, has discovered this morning that Christmas is really shit when you’re an adult.
Mark turned 18 in October and,...
Boris Johnson has baby he knows about
UK Prime Minister, Boris 'Shagger' Johnson has today confirmed the birth of a baby he knows about.
While becoming a father isn't a new experience...
Greggs announces sale of first Vegan sausage roll
Popular cholesterol peddler, Greggs, has today announced the very first sale of a Vegan sausage roll.
The completely meat-free sausage rolls were first put on...
Woman’s yeast infection disproves ‘What happens in Vegas’ theory
Twenty-two-year-old Debbie, from Ellesmere Port, has contracted a terrible YEAST INFECTION on a recent trip to Las Vegas with the girlies.
Debbie travelled out to...
Boris Johnson to return to selling Sugar Puffs
Flop-haired serial shagger, Boris Johnson, is to return to his original career advertising Sugar Puffs on the television.
Boris walked out of the job...
Car 300,000 miles from earth has Audi ‘up its arse flashing its lights’
A car owned by suspected Bond villain Elon Musk has been launched into space in order to orbit Mars. However, the car has already...
