Vue Cinemas to offer financial advice to customers buying popcorn
The FCA (Financial Conduct Authority) has announced it will regulate all sales of popcorn in UK cinemas from next month. The moves comes after...
Donald Trump cancels King’s Landing visit
Orange buffoon, Donald Trump, has cancelled his visit to King’s Landing amid fears he wouldn’t be welcome in Westeros by the Lannisters.
Trump was due...
Cliff Richard changes his name to Iff
Sir Cliff Richard has announced that he is following the example set by Kanye West, and has changed his name to ‘Iff’.
Kaye West recently...
Coronation Street / Eastenders Crossover to create Combined Soap Universe
Soap fans are in for a real treat later this year as plans have been announced for a Combined Soap Universe (CSU) to rival...
Boris Johnson to represent UK in Eurovision 2019
UK to show Europe what an idiot who just makes stupid noises is all about.
Following the winner of this year’s Eurovision, Netta from Israel,...
Ellesmere Port residents claim Wombles aren’t pulling their weight
Some residents in ELLESMERE PORT have announced they’re dissatisfied with the work being put in by Wombles, as the town still looks a shit-tip.
They...
5ive looking for two new members for Ellesmere Port Summer Jam
90s boy band 5ive has announced they’re looking for two temporary members to perform on stage with them at the Ellesmere Port Summer Jam,...
Liverpool’s Fourth Round FA Cup tie to be televised on CBEEBIES
It has been announced that the Fourth Round FA Cup match between Liverpool and the winner of Bristol City or Shrewsbury will be televised...
TARDIS requires extension to fit John Bishop’s teeth
Following the news that scouse comedian, John Bishop, was joining the ranks of Doctor Who it has been confirmed by the BBC that the...
Dance group 2 Unlimited admit there is a limit after attending Speed Awareness Course
The dance duo 2 Unlimited, consisting of Belgian rapper Ray Slijngaard and Dutch singer Anita Doth, have been forced to concede there is a...
