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Saturday, September 26, 2020

Politics

From festivals in Florida to touring Dracula’s digs in Romania, we round up the best destinations to visit this October. As summer abandons Europe again this October, eke out the last of the rays and raves in Ibiza, where nightclubs will be going out with a bang for the winter break. When the party finally stops head to the island’s north.

Tommy Robinson urges supporters to boycott social media

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People's champion, Tommy Robinson, has called for his army of loyal fans to boycott social media until his Facebook account is restored.

Gammons tell Shamima Begum to stay on International Space Station

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British Schoolgirl, Shamima Begum, has been told by the UK's gammons to remain on the International Space Station. Shamima...

Disaster movies where government ignores scientists reclassified as documentaries

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Big-budget Hollywood disaster movies, such as 2012 and San Andreas, have been reclassified as documentaries by the Internet Movie Database (IMDB).

Margaret Thatcher statue to be displayed in Ellesmere Port

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The statue of former Prime Minister, Margaret Thatcher, is to be displayed in Ellesmere Port, it has been revealed.

Government hires YODEL to deliver Brexit

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In a move of unrivaled incompetence, the Tory government has hired parcel-delivery shirkers YODEL to deliver Brexit. YODEL, it was revealed by...

Piers Morgan still a cunt

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It was today confirmed that annoying fat head, Piers Morgan, is still a cunt. Rumours were circulating online yesterday...

Jacob Rees-Mogg questioned over Whitechapel murders

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Victorian time traveller, Jacob Rees-Mogg, has been questioned by police over a series of grizzly murders that were committed in Whitechapel, London,...

Sacha Baron Cohen confirms Donald Trump is one of his characters

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Comedy actor Sacha Baron Cohen, best known for playing Ali G and Borat, has today confirmed that President Donald Trump is in fact another...

Michael Gove returns to animated crime-fighting job

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In a shock announcement that will further destabilise Prime Minister Theresa May’s shaky government, Environment Secretary Michael Gove has stood down from his post...

New Brexit Secretary, Snake Plissken, pledges Escape from Europe

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Theresa May has taken the unorthodox step of appointing fictional outlaw Snake Plissken as the new Brexit Secretary. Plissken has a reputation of not...

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