LEADING scientists have today proven that the ‘pain’ women claim to feel during childbirth is, in fact, not that painful at all.

For many years the fairer sex has claimed that childbirth is extremely painful but, thanks to new research from leading scientists, we now know that not to be true. The illusion of pain women experience is, instead, caused by women’s hysteria and a general befuddlement to the whole situation unfolding.

The scientists used very complicated science techniques that women wouldn’t possibly understand, due to the fuzziness of their minds.


The scientist leading the study, Doctor Alfred von-Bloke, commented:

Women don’t actually feel any pain at all during childbirth. It’s all in their tiny little heads. Bless them.

Lads’ lad, Ste Fellows from Ellesmere Port, offered his opinion on the research.

I knew it. Bloody mares, always whinging about childbirth like it’s bloody painful. They all do it again though don’t they? Wouldn’t catch me volunteering for a second kick in the bollocks would ya?

Following the publication of the results earlier today, women have been instructed not to make such a fuss about giving birth in future and to just ‘get on with it’.



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