The popular tourist attraction, Chester Zoo, has announced it is to open an exhibit featuring men from Ellesmere Port. The exhibit, entitled ‘Primitive Port’, is due to open in August and features a number of men who have wandered into the zoo from Ellesmere Port, and failed to find their way out again.

Rather than put the men down, which is what happens in other attractions such as the Blue Planet Aquarium, Chester Zoo has vowed to care for the men and turn them into an exhibit.

The exhibit is expected to be very popular with Cestrians, who are reported to be looking forward to seeing men from Ellesmere Port in a more natural environment than Chester’s pubs and clubs.


Most people from Chester only see men from Ellesmere Port when they’re smashed out of what brains they have in Chester’s seedier bars, looking for someone to fight. In these instances, they’re not safe to approach, so can’t be properly observed and fully enjoyed.

The new exhibit will feature the captive Ellesmere Port men in as natural an environment as possible, and is expected to recreate a ‘street scene’ featuring trolleys, a smashed bus shelter and a bench for drinking on. The Ellesmere Port men will be kept behind a specially secured fence, and will be patrolled by an experienced keeper who will throw chips at the men should they become too rowdy.

A spokesman for Chester Zoo commented this afternoon:

We’re very excited about our latest exhibit. We just hope the Alpha male doesn’t kill off all the other males before we open in August. To be on the safe side, we are having them fixed.

What do the Bugle’s readers think about the new exhibit at Chester Zoo? Will you be attending? Let us know in the comments below.


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