The NRA (National Rifle Association) is to release a set of shooting targets depicting school and college kids to help passionate shooters maximise their impact in the next school gun massacre.

A mass school shooting occurs in the USA every few months, where gun-toting rifle fanatics take their arsenal of legally-obtained weapons to a local school and kill as many students, teachers and passers-by as they can. The festival is a much-loved part of the American calendar, and is protected under the Fifth Amendment, despite some crazy people believing something should be done to stop it.

The NRA is now to help gun-lovers get better at shooting kids en masse by releasing a set of targets featuring college students and school children.


An NRA spokesperson commented:

The rights of our members to own guns and shoot whoever they want cannot be challenged. It’s in the constitution. We’re releasing these targets to help our members shoot gooder.

The targets will be dispatched to exited gun nuts, complete with maps of their local schools showing entry points, and planned shooting routes. The targets also come with a set of instructions for gun enthusiasts who want to commit a mass shooting without jeopardising the coveted Fifth Amendment, and risking any nonsense campaign against guns.

Shooters are advised to avoid killing any pretty blonde girls. We don’t want a media backlash. Aim for the Hispanic and black kids.

The NRA spokesmen also defended the President of the United States, and his reaction to the latest school shooting.

Let’s not forget the real victim in all of this. Mr Trump. Our thoughts and prayers go with him in this difficult time as the looney liberals try to use this latest shooting to make some sort of point about guns.

Fans of automatic weapons and assault rifles are advised to buy spares of the targets, as hitting them from 20 yards with a hail of gunfire will cut the targets in half. The spokesperson added.

We wanted it to be realistic

The targets go on sale next week, just in time for the next school shooting.


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