A local café, in the Port Arcades, has won a nationwide Halloween decoration contest without entering, or putting up a single Halloween decoration.

The café, which asked not to be named, was entered in the national contest by one of its regular customers, Brian Bumstead, from Little Sutton.

The contest has been running for the last four weeks, with cafes all over the UK entering for the chance to win the title of ‘Scariest UK café’. Some cafes have spent thousands of pounds on Halloween decorations, putting up fake cobwebs, plastic spiders and hanging skeletons.

One of the entrants that did not win

However, they have all been beaten by the café from Ellesmere Port, which took the top prize for its décor without spending a single penny on decorations.

The café owner, Fred Weasel, commented:

If you’re not buying anything you can get the f*ck out!

The café was entered into the national competition by loyal customer, Brian Bumstead. He commented:

The café is an absolute disgrace. It’s covered in filth, spiders and rats. At first I thought they’d done the place up for Halloween last year and forgot to take down the decorations. Nope, it’s all real.

The organisers of the competition voted on the winner without visiting any of the cafes, they just went off the photos that were submitted. James Elroy, one of the judges, commented:

The Ellesmere Port café was incredible. It really looked like a dirty, desolate crypt where you might find a decomposing body. I don’t know how they did it.

We asked the café owner, Fred Weasel, for one last comment. He retorted:

Get f*cked!



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