A local cat has been quietly plotting his revenge against the owners who have dressed him up to look like a twat, it has been revealed.
The cat has been placed in a basket covered with tinsel, and adorned with a Santa hat, all in the name of getting a cute photo for a Facebook post. While his owners, David and Samantha from Ellesmere Port, believe he looks ‘adorable’ and have shared his image with their friends – the cat hates everything about the ordeal.
The cat’s revenge will be swift and brutal, and it will happen when his owners least expect it, we can exclusively reveal.
The nature of the cat’s revenge is expected to come in the form of a trashed Christmas tree, or perhaps a stolen Christmas turkey. The cat hasn’t yet decided. Until his revenge comes he is content to let his owners believe they have got away with making him look like a twat, and that it doesn’t bother him.
It does.
David and Samantha got the cat as a substitute for not having a child. As such, they take every opportunity to treat the cat like the child they don’t have. This is something else the cat detests. In fact the cat hates pretty much everything about his owners, and is planning to get some new ones after Christmas – once his revenge has been completed.
The little thing can side with me! Let it know, and it’ll be great! Freedom, see? We’d both get it. The more working together, the better.
And Debbie’ll never know, as it turns out she can’t read. Not like me, at least.
Always wanted a cat, ya hear?
Out of a dog an a cat, it’ll be a cat. She seems more like a cat.