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Wednesday, August 22, 2018
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From festivals in Florida to touring Dracula’s digs in Romania, we round up the best destinations to visit this October. As summer abandons Europe again this October, eke out the last of the rays and raves in Ibiza, where nightclubs will be going out with a bang for the winter break. When the party finally stops head to the island’s north.

Sooty confirmed as new James Bond

Popular children’s entertainer Sooty has been confirmed as taking over from Daniel Craig in the 007 franchise. Daniel Craig’s next film, due later this...

Queen wins Chester’s inaugural gurning competition

Her Majesty the Queen arrived in Chester this afternoon to enter the town’s inaugural gurning competition, where people attempt to make the most unpleasant...

Boris Johnson to represent UK in Eurovision 2019

UK to show Europe what an idiot who just makes stupid noises is all about. Following the winner of this year’s Eurovision, Netta from Israel,...

Room without a roof not particularly ‘happy’ Pharrell informed

Popular rapper Pharrell Williams has been informed that a room missing its roof isn’t particularly happy, correcting his earlier confusion. In an upbeat tune, Pharrell...

Boring James Milner parody account to SUE James Milner for copyright infringement

The PARODY Twitter account for James Milner, @BoringMilner, has announced it is suing the Liverpool player James Milner for copyright infringement. For several years Boring...

Ellesmere Port police issues WARNING over gang of wanted fugitives

Locals in Ellesmere Port have been warned by police to be vigilant over a gang of escaped convicts who are believed to be active...

Arsenal’s Aaron Ramsey questioned by police over celebrity deaths

Arsenal and Wales footballer, Aaron Ramsey, is today being questioned by Metropolitan Police detectives over a spate of celebrity deaths. It is alleged that Mr...

David Dickinson FURY as Corbyn admits HATRED of orange Jews

Bronzed TV host, David Dickinson, is enraged at the latest anti-Semitic outburst from Jeremy Corbyn. In a recent appearance on the breakfast TV show, Saturday...

Game of Thrones struggling to find UK locations where winter hasn’t already arrived

Producers on the hit HBO series, Game of Thrones, have been struggling to find locations within the UK for filming where winter is merely...

Tommy Robinson Announces De-Colouring Book

Conformity champion and former EDL leader, Tommy Robinson, has appeared on morning television to announce his de-colouring book. The new book hopes to tap...

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