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From festivals in Florida to touring Dracula’s digs in Romania, we round up the best destinations to visit this October. As summer abandons Europe again this October, eke out the last of the rays and raves in Ibiza, where nightclubs will be going out with a bang for the winter break. When the party finally stops head to the island’s north.

McCanns to open childminding business

Parenting experts, Kate and Gerry McCann, have announced they’re to open a new childminding business in Chester. The new business, named ‘Hide and Seek...

Jacob Rees-Mogg questioned over Whitechapel murders

Victorian time traveller, Jacob Rees-Mogg, has been questioned by police over a series of grizzly murders that were committed in Whitechapel, London,...

New Cheshire Oaks fashion store tells shoppers “You’re too ugly to enter”

A new up-market fashion brand, recently opened in Cheshire Oaks, has caused uproar among locals by telling some shoppers they are “too ugly to...

Corbyn laid wreath for Megatron at Autobot City

SHOCKING news emerged this morning as it was revealed Jeremy Corbyn laid a wreath for diabolical Decepticon leader Megatron at the scene of his...

Gerry McCann to enter the jungle

Parenting expert, Gerry McCann, has been revealed as the latest celebrity to enter the jungle on ITV’s hit show I’m A Celebrity, Get Me...

Wetherspoon to ‘enhance dining experience’ by microwaving meals at diners’ tables

The UK's dreariest pub chain, JD Wetherspoon, has announced it intends to compete with the current trend of having meals prepared at your table. Certain...

M56 to become a Toll Road

Secret plans were leaked this week to turn the M56 into a toll road. Regular users of the motorway will be aware of the almost...

CONFIRMED: 97% of chefs wipe their cock on Piers Morgan’s food

A recent poll of the nation's chefs has confirmed that 97% admitted to wiping their cock on Piers Morgan's food before he...

12 arrests and 9 seriously injured in crazed Port Arcades bike protest

A peaceful bike protest turned into a bloodbath this afternoon after protestors and security guards clashed in Ellesmere Port. The bike protest, which was...

Prince Harry’s stag do to start in Ellesmere Port’s oldest surviving pub

The Horse & Jockey, the oldest surviving pub in Ellesmere Port, is to be the stage for the start of Prince Henry of Wales’...

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