In a bold move, Ellesmere Port has become the first town in Britain to ditch roundabout regulations, it has been revealed. Council leaders announced this week that, as of today, the Highway Code regulations governing roundabouts wouldn’t be enforced in Ellesmere Port.
The local residents of Ellesmere Port have always been in a state of confusion over who has right of way at a roundabout, with near misses and accidents a daily occurrence.
The recent decision to add three new roundabouts on Stanney Lane has completely flummoxed locals, with nobody having the faintest idea who should go, and who should wait.
The issue of roundabouts in often debated on local Facebook groups, such as Pride in the Port, where residents go to voice their annoyance at some indiscretion they have suffered at a roundabout at the hands of an incompetent driver. The posts usually degrade into arguments, where the fact that nobody knows how to use a roundabout is made quite evident by the people stating their opinions.
Only last week, a local Ellesmere Port resident posted his annoyance at someone who believed they had right of way as they were coming from the right. He was annoyed how the woman had ‘nearly side swiped’ him as he pulled out. Some members of the group agreed with him on how nobody understands the rules of roundabouts, whereas others pointed out how she indeed ‘was in the right’, as she was coming from the right.
The post will most likely be eventually deleted by the group admin, as are all posts concerning roundabouts as they’re too confusing for people.
Council leaders have had enough and, as of today, there are no rules for roundabouts in Ellesmere Port. It is now a case of whoever gets there first gets to go first.
Gerald Meehan, off Cheshire West and Chester Council, commented:
People in other towns manage to use roundabouts, but not here. I don’t know what’s wrong with people in Ellesmere Port. They’re idiots. Fine, do what you want from now on.
Whether you’re coming from the right, left or straight over the roundabout it doesn’t matter. Just go for it. We don’t care anymore.
Here at the Chester Bugle we’re sure this will make things better. It sure can’t make things any worse.